By Victor Ochieng
When we get into marriage, one of our biggest wishes, hopes, and prayers is that our marriage partner may love us and be attracted to us. This is so for obvious reasons.
But it gets really heartbreaking to learn that our spouse is attracted to someone else. That was the case of Jaclyn S. Parrish, a writer for the International Mission Board.
Her husband, Sam, is attracted to men. Sam was in that condition even at the time of their marriage, and, as you can imagine, it was a big struggle. Parrish, too, was aware of Sam’s challenge. However, in the middle of all that, they both chose to trust in Christ to provide direction and deliverance.
Parrish says most people who hear their story normally get curious to know what their marriage is like. “So . . . what’s that like?” If she were to give an honest answer, she’d say, “It’s difficult. It’s lonely. It’s painful and scary.”
But then again, because of the Blood of our LORD and Savior Jesus Christ, she can say with great joy that “where sin increased, grace abounded all the more” (Rom 5:20). Parrish says she wouldn’t wish her husband’s life story on any other person, but also wouldn’t trade it for anything.
She believes it’s not out of their own ability that their marriage has remained intact. Yes, that’s why she points at 1 Timothy 2:13 that makes it clear that to trust on another person, her partner, is just the work of the living God. At the same time, she acknowledges that without the love of God, it’s impossible for us to love wholly.
Parrish looks at their marriage in a positive light. She says, “But to think, we might have missed it. Without his past sin and present struggle, Sam and I might have plodded through our entire life together and missed the miracle. But because of my husband’s struggle with same-s*x attraction, we get to see our marriage for what every Christian marriage is: a wondrous, dangerous, glorious, and thunderous testimony to the greatness of God’s redemption and the goodness of his plan.”
Truth be told, Parrish is a rare breed of woman. Because she took a vow as she entered into her marriage with Sam, she’s not ready to abandon it because of her husband’s condition. “When I was in second grade, I bet my eternity on Scripture. When I married Sam, I bet my life on it.”
Even though some people pity them, look at them with disgust, while others with great fascination, the couple has learned to live their lives to the glory of God and not the opinions of men.